Suddenly, This Summer 6 // Not Yet Lovers

Summer break was nearly over. He Luo’s aunt who worked as a cashier in a flax factory gave her a dress, a beige one mixed with some light brown. Mom really liked it, repeatedly saying it was delicate and elegant, and wanted He Luo to wear it when school reopened.

He Luo firmly refused to do so and nearly said that the dress was linen-made and was therefore unlucky. But Mom insisted, to the point of coercion, “Okay, you either wear this or you wash all your clothes in the future.” She had no choice but yield to Mom, putting on the dress depressingly.

Today, everyone decided to watch a movie before returning to the school to play basketball. He Luo thought, Look at the whiteness of your dress, its knee-length, it was totally out of place with basketball.

Zhang Yuan who was already zooming past her on his bike suddenly braked. He turned around and stared at her for a moment. With some surprise, he said, “He Luo, it really is you?”

“Of course.” She was shocked. “Did you forget me after one summer?”

“Why did you become all fragile and ladylike after one summer?” Zhang Yuan got down and pushed the bike on the pedestrian’s walkway.

“Probably because I’ve been babysitting,” He Luo began complaining. After the first of her relatives visited, everything snowballed. Every other day, there would be Dad’s friends, Mom’s classmates, a bunch of aunts and uncles sending their children to learn from her. In the eyes of relatives, He Luo was a good child even though they knew little of her hobbies and temperament. But what did it matter? She was a good student.

Being a good student was most parents’ only standard for being a good child.

“Just say you need to study.”

“I already said as much.” She sighed. “My dad shook his head and said a few days ago when he saw me reading comics and going out to play, I didn’t say I want to study.”

“No wonder I didn’t see you around to play with us.” Zhang Yuan raised his eyebrows and said, “Why didn’t anyone look for me? If it’s me, I would make them read comics with me, show them cartoons and wuxia novels. I bet in less than two days, there won’t be a single parent sending their child over.”

“Yes, yes, and you won’t see me ever again.” He Luo said, “If He family’s scholarly name is ruined in my hands, my dad would definitely break my bones.”

“My home is hosting summer school, not only is it free, it also comes with free lunch,” she concluded.

“En, I can see that.” Zhang Yuan’s smile was bright, showing a set of straight teeth. He was wearing a baseball cap, looking like he was in high spirits.

She had not seen him in a long time. During the break, her heart constantly felt empty. Even when she closed her eyes, or stared at the white wall, she would see his presence. At this moment, he really was in front of her, smiling. Instead it felt even more like a dream.

But Zhang Yuan never called her.

I’m only one of his many friends. It’s the same with or without me, she thought sadly. Naturally she would also not call him. What would she say? Asking questions about schoolwork felt too hypocritical. Should she just be honest and say that she missed him?

Yes, I miss you.

He Luo often thought that in that quiet summer night, she should have stopped, turned around, and said, “Being with you makes me really happy, too.”

Would his expression be joyful, surprise, or avoiding? He Luo had no way of knowing. Whatever it was, it wasn’t the expression he had now, looking like he couldn’t hold back his smile. “You’re dressed so solemnly today, from afar I thought you were Teacher Lin.”

Was this the reunion that she desperately looked forward too? What a failure.

They reached the entrance of the cinema. Zhang Yuan left to store his bike.

Li Yun Wei went to He Luo’s side. “Hey, hey, what a coincidence. Did you come together?”

“I only met him just now.”

“I thought since you’re dressed so femininely today and can’t take big steps, that guy purposely took you here on his bike.” Tian Xin also stood next to He Luo. “Yun Wei told me everything.”

“What tell you everything, what is there to talk about.” He Luo had never told anyone her thoughts.

“That my seatmate treats you very nicely.” Li Yun Wei smiled slyly. “Just to find out where you are, he even agreed to do labour.”

“Isn’t he nice to you all?” He Luo refuted. “Yun Wei, after you said the spare ribs his mom was good, he always brought enough for two and even gave everyone some. Tian Xin, he gave you the best position in the campus singing competition line-up and went first. Didn’t you praise him for being a gentleman for an entire month?”

“When you put it that way, my seatmate seems like Jia Bao Yu [a character in Dreams of the Red Mansion].” Li Yun Wei waved her hand. “But I feel that you’re different.”

“En, this sentence makes my ears grow callus.” Zhang Yuan pretended to look serious. “But I can still reward you each with ice cream.”

“You don’t want this?” Li Yun Wei asked. “My seatmate is quite stupid, he should have just bought ‘true love’.”

Their faded white curtains gradually turned a greyish black.

“Who said?”

“She has a woman’s sixth sense,” Tian Xin giggled.

“Might as well say she has the seventh sense, a little universe,” He Luo retorted.

“Why do you girls chatter non-stop as soon as you meet? You’re a bunch of sparrows.” Zhang Yuan grinned as he walked past them. “You all must have gone mad from holding back during the holidays. Are you exchanging new gossip?”

“What.” Li Yun Wei’s eyes turned into crescents from laughing. “We’re saying you’re good looking.”

It was red bean ice cream again. He Luo frowned as she held the popsicle. Zhang Yuan had thoughtlessly grabbed the ice cream for her. But she actually wanted to eat ice cream sandwich today.

Tian Xin was slowly licking her ice cream. Apparently this way she could protect her vocal cords. “Who cares what is it, Zhang Yuan originally only wanted to buy He Luo ice cream. We’re the ones who basking in her light.”

“I think you should have bought ‘so funny’,” He Luo replied. But inside, it felt sweet.

*

After school reopened, the school board conducted their checks and the school demanded that every classroom was clean. All the facilities were ready for use by the time they enrolled in the first year. Even now, in second year class 6, they still have their curtains although it was faded. There was a classmate reading magazines while eating lunch. The classmate wiped his oil-stained hands on the curtain and continued to flip the pages.

Lin Shu Zhen did not know whether to cry or laugh. “Is there anyone who wipes their hand on the curtain? Aren’t you worried that someone has wiped their shoe there before?”

The students were enlightened from her words. Some boys began putting their feet on top of the heater and used the curtain to wipe their shoes. They acted like they had a good sense of civic-mindedness and even wiped the heater. They were too lazy to wash the cleaning cloth after using it, might as well use the universally useful curtains.

Li Yun Wei was part of the Wellness Committee and took on the responsibility to buy new curtains. She wanted to drag Zhang Yuan along to be her slave. He waved his hands impatiently. “Don’t talk to me, I’m worrying about something else.”

The results for the last semester’s biology and geography finals were just released. Most classmates had memorised the syllabus like it was the back of their hands and naturally done well. Zhang Yuan’s score for biology was excellent but his score for geography was only good.

“I thought I have already followed the lessons pretty well, but some of the questions are really too senseless,” he said. “For example, ‘in each of the following group of countries, the population that does not exceed 100 million, which is which.’ I’m not part of registry commission member, how would I know.”

“It was in the notes, you could have memorised it.” Li Yun Wei smiled.

“If I have that time, I might as well do something else.”

“Like what? Physics questions bank?”

“Basketball, napping, playing games,” Zhang Yuan said. “Do you know Uncharted Waters? What a good geography textbook.”

“Which film is that from, or it is a drama?” Li Yun Wei asked.

“Seatmate, can I look down on you?” He turned to He Luo. “Do you know?”

“Ah, it’s that computer game.”

Li Yun Wei smiled. “I don’t know anything about computer games. You two have a common topic, come, come. Go and buy curtains together.”

He Luo said, “Okay, give me the class fund. I would pass by the department store on my way home anyway.”

“Then seatmate, are you going?”

“If I have to go, then I’ll just go.” Zhang Yuan smiled. “I’ll go and monitor He Luo, in case she turns the curtains into snacks.”

*

While waiting in front of the school gate, it happened to be the peak hour for students to leave the school. Zhang Yuan frowned when he saw the line. “Why don’t we walk there?”

He Luo said, “I’m sure we can squeeze in. You must not take the bus often.”

“Then are you going to ride it alone? Even if you’ve got in, I will drag you down.” Zhang Yuan laughed and made her stand behind him. “Let me go before you, in case you’re squeezed until your arms and legs are all flat.”

He Luo wanted to tell him that the crowd right now was considered small. She would fight on the battlefield this way every day. But standing behind him, she forgot to open her mouth.

The both of them were wearing the school’s custom sportswear, a mix of white and a copper sulphate blue. Mom said it was truly like blue skies and white clouds, so painfully old-fashioned. But truly Zhang Yuan made whatever he wore look good. His sleeves were rolled, the jacket was left open revealing a white shirt inside. He stood there casually basking in the light of early autumn, looking undeniably carefree.

He Luo’s entire figure was hidden in his long shadow, her nose almost touching his sports jacket. She was really afraid that her nose would sweat and smear the blue skies on his jacket.

Once bus no. 2 opened its doors, people began pouring from inside. Zhang Yuan had already been forced near the entrance, his tongue peeking out. “Oh my god, we better just walk.”

He Luo nodded, a little regretful.

A public bus is like an enclosed sardine can, with everyone rubbing shoulders with each other with zero-distance with the passenger next to them.

The both of them have never had the opportunity to stand so close to each other.

In the department store, they walked past the Swiss army knives counter. Zhang Yuan kept on looking over. “I have a similar one, a mini-sized one.” He pointed to show He Luo. “When I go to university, I will ask my dad to buy another one. Look, the Rambo series is so cool. It can be used as a knife and also a compass and hook line.”

“Ah, sounds like it’s not just one drop of blood or two.” He Luo giggled. “Sounds like Robinson Crusoe.” But she still paid attention to the price tag, nearly 600 yuan. He Luo was not short of savings but every purchase had to be accounted for. The money she could freely use was only 20 yuan a month. She could only remember it in her heart. Since then, every time she shopped in a department store, she would look for the Swiss army knives counter.

*

Li Yun Wei seemed to be incredibly pleased with herself afterwards and said her inference can’t be incorrect. “Just look, once my seatmate heard he’ll be going shopping with you, what worries, what examinations, he totally put those in the back of his mind.”

“Not shopping, it’s running a class errand,” He Luo corrected. “Ay, doesn't matter, doesn't matter,” Li Yun Wei leaned on He Luo's shoulders. “I'll create opportunities for you.”

Every week, there would be two listening lessons in English class conducted in the school’s auditorium. Li Yun Wei snatched the best seat in the middle row with Tian Xin and Bai Lian sitting to her left. She told Zhang Yuan and the boys to sit to her right. After He Luo passed the VCD from Teacher Lin to the staff, she saw that the empty seat saved for her was next to Zhang Yuan. Li Yun Wei loudly asked for her to come over. Zhao Cheng Jie was about to get up to let her pass but He Luo stopped him. “The movie is almost starting, don’t get up and block the students behind you. I’ll sit in the front row.”

During the break where the staff changed the VCD, Li Yun Wei ran over. “What’s the matter, are you shy?”

He Luo pulled her out of the auditorium. “I don’t want everyone to look at Zhang Yuan and I instead of the movie. You’re my best friend and lately you’ve been so obviously pushing the two of us together. It’s as if I’m the one asking you to do so.”

“I’m also Zhang Yuan’s seatmate, why don’t they say it’s his doing?” Li Yun Wei looked over to the field. “I really don’t understand the two of you. You like each other, but you’re not together. Cowards.”

“Who said we like each other? It’s your universe again?” He Luo burst out laughing. “You’ve been watching too many romance movies during the holidays.”

“It’s impossible to hide a concerned gaze,” Li Yun Wei firmly said.

*

“I’m indeed a coward,” He Luo wrote in her diary. “Zhang Yuan treats everyone so nicely, his smile doesn’t belong to me alone. I often felt like he was being kind to me, as if his every word has a deeper meaning, but who can tell me if this is not just my one-sided crush’s wishful thinking? I don’t want to be blinded by a false sweetness, unable to see the reality. It’s nice like this, I can talk and laugh with him every day, it’s nice.”

Everything was good, only because that clingy shadow did not appear next to Zhang Yuan.